“I’ve been spending some frequent times with a long time friend and it seems that the path we are on it is probable that our friendship is growing into an intimate relationship.
In getting to know each other at a deeper level, yesterday he confided in me that he is a habitual drug user. Whilst I’m not anti-drug in total as I have had my experiences in the past, a few years ago I made a decision for myself to be drug free and all is well there. In my conscious awareness I never imagined I would be attracted to a man that does these things.
In all your understandings of how this world works, is it possible for a spiritually aware person to hold a relationship and loving space for somebody who isn’t yet aware and involved in self abuse?
Is it possible for one person to love another that it inspires that person to start having self-love?
Thanking you in advance for your help”
> Is it possible for a spiritually aware person to hold a relationship and loving space for somebody who isn’t yet aware and involved in self abuse?
Yes, and you do it by focusing on the aspects in that person that you love and appreciate and you take your attention off those things that you don’t. You do not contradict or mix your attention of love with that of what you don’t like
The thing is whether you can keep your attention off those things that you want to keep it off. The vibration of the love and appreciation of the other person can be built by focusing on what you love and adore about them (without contradicting those thoughts with what you don’t like or that scare you), and that attracts more of the same and the things that you don’t like you will tend to focus on less and less
So what happens if this person furthers their self abuse? There is the possibility of that and you could say to yourself right now that you don’t want to go down that road by not going into this relationship. Or, you could say that you love this person and you’re willing to take whatever path things go in the future and you love them unconditionally. Neither is right or wrong and is totally a choice you can make. There is nothing wrong with either choice, in fact there is never anything wrong in any decision we make in the Universe, the Universe/God never makes a judgement, only we do
> Is it possible for one person to love another that it inspires that person to start having self-love?
So now I guess this is talking about whether you can change his behaviour? Well as you focus your love and attention and appreciation to him, that itself will be a drug for him. That is what we feel when we are in love.
What I would say to anyone going into any relationship is to focus on what you love about that person and not on the things that you would like to change and don’t like. Through your love that person can change, but you should be in such a place that whether that person changes or not you are at peace with it. That is unconditional love and that is alignment.
In you being in that place, whether that person changes or doesn’t won’t matter to you, and ironically it will create the most fertile ground for them to change – but that is also a choice for them to make