Fear as a Choice

This is a post that Jodi Nelmes posted on the Universal Law Of Attraction group on Facebook, and below is my reply to her

I want to discuss an experience I just had that made me realize a few
things about fear. What I essentially realized was that fear is a
choice, and something very interesting about fear is why we chose to be
afraid. I guess lots of people chose fear for different reasons, and
maybe for some it is not a choice but I think often we do chose to be

On Monday June 2nd I had open heart surgery. I had a
hole in my heart called an ASD and I got it closed up. In September
2007, I learned that I was going to have open heart surgery so I had a
long time to think about it and deal with the idea. Actually it was
soon after I found this out that I was introduced to movies like The
Secret and Abraham The Secret Behind the Secret. I feel like I did
attract these things into my life because I needed them to help me deal
with what I was facing.

At first I was scared to get this
surgery. The thought of being cut open was quite disturbing. But when I
saw Abraham the Secret Behind the Secret I realized that I am not
defined by my body. I am something bigger than my body and I can have
control over my body. With this realization my fear lessened. Thinking
of myself as an eternal being also helped my fear decrease because I
thought, no matter what happens, everything will be OK.

week before my surgery I did many meditations and tried to feel as much
love and peace as I could. It was during this week that I realized that
I was not really scared anymore. I wondered why I had been scared
before. It was probably the night before surgery that I realized why I
had been scared. I was reading Louise Hay's Heal Your Body and the part
about how all physical ailments are a result of either fear or anger
popped off the page at me. I realized that our bodies give us
indications of how we're out of alignment with our true selves, and
having fear is one of the ways we get out of alignment.

Pink rose

then why was I scared? I think that we chose fear because we think it
serves us in some way. For me it was almost like a programmed fear. I
just thought it is normal to be scared about surgery, so that is what I
felt. In certain situations fear is a good thing to have because it
makes us avoid dangerous situations or it helps us get out of dangerous
situations. For example, if we're in a situation where we need to run
to save our lives, fear releases adrenaline and enables us to have a
physical reaction which helps us escape more easily.

But we
often have fear when it does not serve us in this way. I think that we
think having fear will protect us because in other situations it does.
And then when we are scared we attract that which we fear and we think
this confirms that we were correct to be scared in the first place. But
if we weren't scared we wouldn't have attracted that which we fear so
fear is really not the protective emotion that we think it is in many

The night before my surgery I watched Abraham the
Secret Behind the Secret again and I slept so well that night. I felt
peace and love and I knew I could handle whatever happened. I also knew
that if I chose to be scared it would be more difficult for me to
handle what was to happen. I felt that if I was peaceful and happy my
vibrations of peace would be absorbed by the staff performing the
surgery and everything would go smoothly. Conversely I thought that if
I was scared they would feel my stress. I told myself that I didn't
have to worry about what was to happen when I was under the anesthetic
because I wouldn't really be there. It was not my job to control that
situation in detail it was just my job to be happy.

I feel
that as a result of my peace, and joy going into surgery it went very
well. I used to be very scared of needles but instead of being scared I
said things to myself like, "They are giving me medicine of joy". When
they took the drainage tubes out of my chest while I was awake, I said
"I am releasing the tubes of Joy", and it was actually a pretty cool
experience, instead of one that would have made me faint.

might have been one of the best things that has ever happened to me,
because it has shown me how much I can handle, and it has given me a
greater appreciation for everything in life.

Thanks for this post, Jodi

It's an excellent one about the mind
and spirit and seeing beyond what we have believed our bodies to be,
beyond the physical that we see and calling through to what more there

Dealing with fear, oftentimes for people when they experience
something physical or health related there is a panic, perhaps also
from the (mis)conception that the physical is 'fixed', it cannot be
changed, 'what could go wrong', etc. And the title of your post changes
that perception which once was an instinctive reaction by people, to
considering and realising their instinctive reactions.

'reality' is that your body is constantly replenishing itself and it is
doing it by the blueprint from your thoughts and emotions.

approach of tapping into that larger part of you through your thoughts
and emotions, perhaps maybe initially grabbing onto something for hope,
and working it, and improving the vibration, and improving the
vibration, and improving the vibration and so on, is a wonderful
example and credit to you for your handling of it, and also your
ability to share and communicate it with others.

You also used a word that people don't often use in the same sentence as surgery, 'joy' lol.

The Secret and Weight Loss

This was a question I received for the Law of Attraction book,

Hi Hemal

My question is about weight loss — I know that the documented way to
weight loss in The Secret is to focus on the body you want and not on the idea
that weight must be lost AND to love the current body you’re in….which seems
like Catch 22, because if you loved the body you were in you wouldn’t want to
change it, right?



You focus on what you like (about your body) and your actions and everything else etc are as a consequence of that, i.e. feeling good, which initially may not very feel good but it’s about playing with the thoughts about the subject and practicing the vibration (there is more on this in other articles on this blog).  It’s finding something you DO like, and it could be something you like currently, something you’ve liked before, something you WILL like, or just something unrelated which feels good (and doesn’t activate the resistance about it), the feeling good will summon energy which can be in the form of ideas, inspiration, action, etc.

I did something similar last year and I found myself coming across all different types of nutritional products and supplements which were really helpful, and I would come across people who knew about training and nutrition who were willing to offer their suggestions.  Now that is on the action level (which came from ideas and inspiration I had, which came from working on the vibrational level as mentioned above).  You might get some ideas on what you are currently doing or could do, you will literally draw the experience into you from the vacuum you create with your vibration that pulls it towards you.

You’re right, why would you want to lose the weight if you felt good about it?  But feel good about the subject of your body and wellbeing and see what actions you feel like doing.  It’s a different perspective and rather than chasing a condition of ‘good body’, you are expressing/living FROM it and the actions are as a consequence and will feel empowered and stronger

It’s the same in other contexts too, eg rather than someone chasing a relationship because they’re lonely, by feeling great with their own company and the people they already have around them, they will BE better company and attract more friends and relationships as a consequence anyway

You might also want to check out this article I did recently
"I’m in a Fitness Modeling Contest…and ‘I Like Food’…"



“I’m in a Fitness Modeling Contest…and ‘I Like Food’…”

Hi Hemal,

I just, first of all want to thank you for your amazing blog, it’s really
helpful and uplifting.
And I have a question, I am going to compete in my first fitness modeling contest
this year, and as you know I have to be on a special diet exercising etc etc.
Food is something that I really enjoy (as most people) and since I cannot eat what I would like to have I sometimes find myself pigging out one day
or two, then start eating clean for maybe 2 or 3 weeks and then the same thing
happen again. I had no problem stopping the smoking and the drinking since I
started (6months ago) and every time it’s there I just don’t pay attention to it,
and it doesn’t bother me, but with food it’s different I would love to stick to
my diet and not feel guilty and be afraid that I will gain some weight every
time I pig out, or eat something I really like. I’ve been trying to let myself
go to find the answer, but I think I need a little guidance, is there something
that you could tell me please? I would really appreciate it.
Thank you so much.



Thanks Karina 🙂

There is leverage when working from the aspect of Vibration

Strictly speaking your body can actually consume whatever it
wants and look how it wants to, it’s to do with the meaning and beliefs someone
has about the food itself, i.e. the vibration they have about the food. So for example if someone eats chocolate cake
they expect their body to respond a certain way, however if their internal
communication was similar to how their body responds to salad, for example,
then it would have the same response. Now one can either work on the internal communication (working on their
) through visualising their body, working with their beliefs etc, or
do things (‘actions’) such as watch their diet, exercise etc, or a
combination, and the answer to that is whatever is the path of least
resistance, whichever is the quickest/easiest way to get where you want to get.
Doing things from a vibrational point of view always has
more power and leverage

By imagining and feeling how it feels, having the body you
want, in detail, you will find yourself more attracted to the behaviours
conducive to that, you may also find yourself around the right advice, hearing
the right things landing on the right websites, bumping into and speaking to people who have something valuable to offer you and so on. The most important thing you can do is line
up your vibration, your feelings and thoughts towards it
, and let the universe
orchestrate the rest, and the ‘actions’ will also be more familiar and ‘easier’
too. Create compelling emotions for what
you’re about to do, that totally excite you, let your actions be as a consequence of a love for what
you’re about to do than something ‘forced’.

As regarding loving what you are about to do, practice the
thoughts. You might say ‘I’m not looking
forward to the actions of this’, well focus on something you love about what
you’re going to do, even one small aspect that you know you like or love, whatever that may be.  It doesn’t have to
be an action, it could be something about the competition or how your body will look, it could be ANYTHING, even
un-related to what you are doing, just feel good about something (as it will get you off anything
that didn’t feel good), the key thing is when you are feeling good you are attracting good things in all areas, so long as you don’t focus on resistance or negative emotions in that context.

For example, if someone is having a challenge making money, if they can get themselves to focus on any other subject and feel good and not focus on what about money doesn’t feel good to them they will attract money.  So it doesn’t have to be about the subject that you find things that make you feel good, the priority is feeling good, period.

Tap into the Emotions 

So tap into the emotions of why you are doing it, what do
you love about it? What feels good? What excites you? What burns you with enthusiasm and energy?

Initially it might just be a thought, or maybe you have some
strong thoughts. Just focus on whatever
is there, keep your attention on it and don’t contradict it (i.e. don’t think
of things you don’t like about it lol),
and just by starting to focus on something, no matter how small, and keeping
your attention on it it will grow and grow by virtue of Law of Attraction, and
it will continue to keep growing unless you contradict it


What are the best aspects, what do you love about it?

What are the best aspects of what are you about to do? Wouldn’t it be nice if what happened?  What are the things that would be nice to
happen? It’s not about what things you
think about or what you expect or don’t expect or what’s possible or what isn’t, whether they are real or not or any of the details about them,
what’s important is how they feel, and that’s what’s affecting your vibration
and making far far more powerful changes than your actions alone would
.  You could daydream all day and it may not be ‘reality’ but if you just got absorbed in it and it felt good that will do FAR MORE for you than anything else.  When you line up vibrationally you are saving 1000s of action hours.

Seconds of thought are equivalent to thousands of physical action hours

Every 17 seconds of non-contradicted thought you focus on the subject is equivalent to 2000 physical action hours.  Continuing to hold the thought for another 17 seconds (34 seconds in total), thus attracting another thought to it, is equivalent to 20,000 action hours.  51 seconds of thought is equivalent to 200,000 action hours, 68 seconds is equivalent to 2 million physical action hours because each 17 seconds attracts another thought (due to the Law of Attraction) and another thought and so on, and there is a dynamic compounding effect when each thought mixes with the others, and the attraction gets stronger and stronger exponentially and the power and the energy build and attract things to you on a physical level, magnetically and vibrationally things will be drawn to you as a result of your thoughts and you will feel the energy flowing through you.  You will feel excitement and emotions that delight you, they are your indicator on where you are vibrationally, work on feeling good and use your emotions as a guide.